Granted, you can now time travel. Only forward. Without stopping. Ever.

I wish I could play the guitar.

Granted, you get to Cali. see DNA, DNA realizes how much of a terrible person you are, and then decides to kill you in your sleep.
I wish for a high-paying job that doesn't involve any illegal doings, or whoring.

But I already have one, therefore your backfire is useless.

Granted, you get a high-paying and extremely influential job which someone hates you having for some reason or other. That person assassinates you on your first day. With great power comes great responsibility somebody who hates you for it.

I wish, again, to be able to play the guitar (now that it has been established that I own one)

Granted, it jams so you point it in your face to see what jammed it, it then fires and your head is lopped off.
I wish that pokemon TCG was simpler to play.

The cards become easier to get. The game becomes too easy because of all the rare cards not being rare, therefore making it boring.

This is getting filled quickly, oh and by the way... My brother would take over Starter PEC...

I wish for my raygun from my previous wish to exist without backfiring I WANT MY RAYGUN

Granted. But then you have to quit psypokes because you get banned from the internet and I get to the title instead.

I don't wish for a time paradox.

(on the topic of North Korea: what country did you think I was taking about with the spies and the nukes earlier )

Granted, you get Pokémon Y right now. The coding hasn't been finished and all you van do is listen to Professor (insert Professor's name here)'s introduction speech. Oh, and that bit doesn't have 3D graphics yet so you can only view it in 3D. And there's a virus in it which destroys your 3DS
That's what you get for breaking my guitar. You're next Samurott.

I wish that I could juggle.

Granted, I forgot. BUT with all these time travel shenanigans there ends up being three of me: the real me (me), zombie me (who died in the chainsaw juggling accident), and the other me (of dubious origins). Zombie me tells real me that you killed him. Now I have to go and get revenge on you twice.
Zombie me goes to Hollywood, hoping to land an acting job. The other me steals a time machine in all the chaos that is this thread and disappears off somewhere.

I wish Zombie me all the luck he can get in his acting career.

That luck gets transformed into worms. The worms decompose Zombie you and kill him in the middle of an audition. The casters love it and cast him. Although that's what would have happened if he was still moving and not a pile of green, wormy mush.

I wish the Koreans kill themselves with my gun and I get it back. I WANT MY RAY GUN!!!

Granted, but the virus spreads to all Pokémon Y games and then all Pokémon X games in the world. If I can't play them, then no one can. Then, all information and data for Pokémon Z is destroyed in an explosion. Only one copy of Pokémon Z survived. The world descends into chaos as everyone fights to own the last copy. It was eventually given to Zombie me for his outstanding, albeit short, performance career. But since he's dead, I get it. Oh and the virus caused your 3DS to explode in your face.

I wish Zombie me hadn't died, he didn't deserve it.

R.I.P. Zombie me
Born: February 6 2013
Died: February 7 2013
He died as he lived: a drooling moron doing what he loved, eating brains acting.
Goodnight, sweet prince.
P.S. I will avenge you!

Granted, he lives but everyone doesn't think he deserves to live so a massive war erupts, killing him.

I wish that my RAY GUN would just arrive to me safely. Strange how a non backfireable gun backfired three times already.

A raygun doesn't need ammo KILL EVERYONE


Anyway,
Granted, you get one pony. GhostPony to be more specific. Have fun with a briny trolling you.

I wish, well I got my ray gun so I wish that my plan to kill everyone on earth including me is successful

(God I hope my raygun doesn't get destroyed in the process)

Granted, I troll about everything else except Rayguns. Including Raygun parts. Your head later explodes. Or something.



Ummm... Me dying was the point destroying humanity includes me duh!

Anyway.

I'm getting the whole raygun thing out of my head by wishing for a:

I wish for a Flaming Crossbow that never burns to ash. Just the arrows point. It also has to have unlimited arrows that light themselves.


(Also I want a Jay Gun. If I can't have Ray ill have Jay.

You can call me Ray. Or you can call me Jay. But you can't call me lazy, I'm on three times a day!

Granted, It gets shipped to your house in a tiny 5"x 5" box, and you have to assemble it yourself, after several hours of self-assembly, you go and get a snack, only to find your little ___________ (fill in the blank) playing with it, thinking it's a toy, they fire it at you, and you burn to death.
I wish I had a Kyogre in real life again, but this time, I wish it was in a pokeball.

Granted, the million bucks is counterfeit, and whenever you try to spend it, you get arrested and have to serve a 30 year sentence.
I wish that StarCraft II installed faster (Just got it, or I guess my friend just got it)
P.S. Hooray for me, this thread just got 50 posts, and almost 250 views!